Four days earlier water started appearing backstage stage left in the stairwell. I figured it would have been fixed by the time Elements day rolled around. I was wrong. And it had only gotten worse. Instead of a puddle it had grown into a full blown flood & none of the other tech people seemed to be concerned. I lost it. When I get mad it's really frightening. I kind of jut out my jaw like a bulldog and growl like an angry Soprano mob member when I speak. Super attractive. Most of the time I don't even realize I'm doing it. So when I charged into the theater where the cast was gathered for a meeting, everyone froze.
In a low chilling voice, much like Meryl Streep's in The Devil Wears Prada, I asked the production manager if she was aware a monsoon was occurring backstage. Not only would the mysterious pipe water hurt my already delicate costumes but it was a major safety hazard for all the performers. She replied that yes, she'd called the plumber again. Plumbers on ships are the same as plumbers on land. No one knows when they'll actually show up.
As you can correctly guess, I took action myself. I was always taught that if you want something done then you should make it happen and that true leaders are the first ones to pick up a broom. So collected as many towels as I could carry and ventured down into the newly formed lake.
*Side note: when you exit stage left you walk into the wings and then through a door onto a landing with one staircase leading up to the dressing rooms, one leading down to a small storage hallway that enters into the theater and one that is 3 flights tall and takes you down to the I-95.
I began to mop up the water and to my horror discovered it had stared spilling over the landing & down the stairs to the small hallway. As I was soaking up that water I was completely enraged to find the water had further flooded underneath the stairs and the landing. I retrieved a headlamp and maneuvered my way underneath the stairs to clean up that mess. This was a challenge not only because I was now in the dark but because 5 large ladders were being stored under there. I felt like one of those little Disney mice that looks adorable but is hanging out in the underground sewer system.
I finally finished drying the floor and lugging two baskets full of soaking towels up the stairs when sweet Elyse timidly informed me the flooding had started again. Fury. This was not my job and none of the stage techs had even offered much less tried to help me but I was going to fix this problem. And that's when I broke. I started crying and questioning my career choice as I knelt on the cold floor surrounded by wet towels. It was a sad, frustrating, & pathetic moment. The dancers were scared.
Finally the "plumbers" arrived. First they stared at the crime scene, they proceeded the investigation by knocking on a few pipes, one of them crawled into the wall, and then they talked to each other in another language. I didn't yell, but I sternly said that the show starts in 10 minutes and I will be kicking them out soon. Finally someone had the genius idea to turn off the water.
In conclusion, the show went fine and I would not let anyone put their costumes on the floor. I learned that not everyone is going to care about certain things as much as I do. Life is hard. & Sometimes you just have to strap a flashlight to your head and fix the problem yourself.
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